Soohh, I recently dove into the world of “If He Had Been with Me” by Laura Nowlin, hoping for a captivating young adult read. But man, did it disappoint! It could have been a guilty pleasure but I must me getting old as I had tough time digesting this book. Buckle up as this review might not be what you were expecting.
Just for your understanding, here is the plot in short. “If He Had Been with Me” tells the story of Autumn and Finny (Finn), two childhood friends who have been inseparable since they were kids. Autumn has always had a secret crush on Finn but has never found the courage to confess her feelings. Despite their deep emotional connection, they both navigate their friendship without acknowledging their true romantic feelings for each other. Throughout high school, Autumn and Finn spend time together, and their bond only grows stronger. However, Autumn’s longing for a romantic relationship with Finn also intensifies, leading to inner turmoil and constant questioning of what could have been if they were more than just friends. As their senior year progresses, Autumn faces the reality that their paths may diverge after graduation. She grapples with the fear of confessing her feelings, afraid that it might jeopardize their friendship or result in rejection. The novel alternates between the present and flashbacks, revealing significant moments in their friendship. As the story unfolds, it becomes evident that they share a profound understanding of each other, often finishing each other’s sentences and having an unspoken language between them. As the novel reaches its climax, the reader is left with a heart-wrenching realization: Finn had loved Autumn too, but he also struggled with expressing his feelings, believing that Autumn saw him only as a friend. **Spoiler Alert** (written in white ink, select the next lines to see the text) In one poignant moment, Autumn finally decides to reveal her emotions to Finn, but circumstances intervene, and she loses the chance to confess. This missed opportunity leaves her heartbroken and full of regrets.
Alright, now let’s talk about this epic romance between Autumn and Finn. Plotwise it could have been something like 5 centimeters per second. But somehow it felt as fake as those filtered Instagram pictures. Can’t say the relationship between the two lacked depth or authenticity, I wanted to root for them, but all I got were tired clichés and predictable plot twists. And don’t even get me started on the unrealistic expectations this book sets. It’s like they think love can magically solve everything. But we all know that real relationships are messy, complicated, and require more than just a sparkly-eyed soulmate. This old heart feels the book missed the mark big time by sugarcoating the realities of love and life. But I also want to believe that life can be sugarcoated sometimes.
Oh, and let’s not forget about the half-baked exploration of important themes like grief and mental health. They’re brushed over so lightly, it’s like they were checking boxes instead of actually delving into the nitty-gritty. These topics deserved better treatment, more depth, and genuine understanding. Instead, we’re left with superficial nods that felt like an afterthought.
The pacing was all over the place. One moment, I’m trudging through mundane events that had me yawning, and the next, I’m thrown into rushed, over-the-top melodrama. To top it all off, the book leaves loose ends hanging like a poorly tied shoelace. I craved closure, darn it! But no, I’m left dangling with unresolved plot points and an unsatisfied itch for answers. It’s like the author forgot to tie up the loose ends or just didn’t care enough to give us that sense of completion. Felt like it was written by someone I know who loves to leave people hanging and guessing!
So there you have it, folks. “If He Had Been with Me” fell short of my expectations but also left me yearning for more. With its light touch romance, (un)realistic ideals, surface-level exploration of important themes, wonky pacing, and unresolved plot points, it’s not a complete letdown in the world of young adult literature. You might love this, on second thought, if you are looking for a light read (here is the link to Amazon if you fancy light hearted romance novel) on a cold rainy day with soothing music and a scenery. But like I said, I am probably getting older and reading too many of books of this nature, so this wasn’t for me.